Broken (by) Sleep

20140430-093813.jpgAs part of a complex regime of low-level self harm that involves looking at houses I can’t afford on RightMove and clothes I can never wear on ASOS I am now going to write more about Wilbur’s sleep. Oh Wilbur. Strange Wilbur. The mass of contradictions. Beautiful little boy, who is clever and hilarious and a highly skilled torturer.

The boy still doesn’t sleep. I stopped caring, kind of. I mean, I stopped asking why a while a go. No one, at all, has had the pleasure of their suggestions to make him sleep through actually work. We have tried it all. I even tried leaving him to cry – which, as I thought it would, made him sick. Nothing like listening to your baby cry then clearing up their puke.

Last night was the worse night we have ever had. I feel broken today and I suspect Chris does too. Our reserves have gone and we are running on nothing. Two children, demanding jobs and other worries are taking their toll. Our patience levels are at zero, especially with one another. Wilbur just screams and screams and gets more upset and nothing will calm him down. He just has to ride it out and we have to be there for him.

I have no idea what to do and no idea how to help him sleep. Has anyone been through similar? He’s 18 months and all the different sleep training we’ve tried hasn’t helped. He just screams and screams and gets more and more upset. Nothing we do makes a difference. Something has to change though, things have to get easier – surely?

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5 Responses to Broken (by) Sleep

  1. Jo Trott says:

    O Emma, I do sympathise! Hannah was like this for months leading up to Dominic being born (I was getting more and more stressed because I kept thinking – what will I do if she still isn’t sleeping when the baby is born? – I’ll never get any sleep again with 2 of them!!) I spent countless nights in a sleeping bag on her floor, just murmuring to her everytime she rewoke to calm her. I now can’t remember what made her sleep better (we also tried everything that people suggested – controlled crying, uncontrolled crying, only giving her water etc) but she doesn’t do it now (or at least if she does, she’s in a student house in Cardiff, so I don’t have to cope with it!!!!) so she must eventually have grown out of it.. I know that is ABSOLUTELY no comfort to you, but just know it WILL get better xx

  2. Anne says:

    So feel your pain Emma. Joshua didn’t sleep through regularly until he was over 2years old, right before my second was born !! Sleep deprivation really is a form of torture and I’m sorry to say that I have no magic trick to help – I tried everything and remember crying myself when I left him to cry at night. Will Wilbur sleep in bed with you or if you are in his room ? I have done this with both of mine and yes I’m sure it’s against all the baby sleep experts but to be frank, if it’s a way for all of us to sleep, I see no harm. !! And both of them became great, independent sleepers – eventually ! xx

  3. Fiona says:

    I have no advice or words of wisdom, but just wanted to say I’m sorry you’re so tired. I hope your beautiful little man starts sleeping better soon. There is nothing worse than sleep deprivation piled on top of other stresses. xxxx

  4. Vicki says:

    Sophie didn’t sleep properly until she was 5 and at school full time so feel your pain especially as twice a week I work to 1am and then have to deal with the morning rush by myself. She did this at the same sort of age but I think it was night terrors as nothing could console her and all I could do was try my best to console reassure her. In the end she spent most of her time in our bed which like someone else said probably isn’t the done thing but was the only way we got any kind of sleep and yes later on we had to deal with the issue of getting her in her own bed but you have to do what helps you for now Good luck 🙂

  5. Donna says:

    I have no advice really, just want to say that it really can’t be easy and I have no idea how you are coping. I know that @Childcareisfun on Twitter has helped a lot of babies with sleeping issues with her free email advice thing – May be worth a shot. Other than that, I have no idea. -hugs- x

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